What A Best Man Can Do To Make A Groom’s Life A Little Easier
If you’re taking on the time-honoured role of being the best man, or you’ve chosen someone to be yours, then you might want to know exactly what that means. After all, it means more than simply being there to carry the rings on the wedding day, and it means more than just planning a stag party. Here, we’re going to look at the duties that a best man can and should be ready to take on to make the process of getting ready for a wedding easier on the groom.
Organizing the stag
The stag party, or bachelor party, depending on where you come from, is normally considered the first and most important duty of any best man. Of course, this depends on whether or not the groom wants such a party in the first place (which should very much be their decision.) There is a bit of a trend of choosing the most outrageous party destinations and events possible, but it’s important to choose the type of stag party that suits the groom, not to pressure them into trying to enjoy an evening that’s not very well suited to them, at all. As such, the best man should be in charge of finding out the numbers, collecting the money for it, sorting out the accommodations, and more.
Picking out the outfits
While the bride may be somewhat involved in the decision making, the choice of picking the attire for the men in the wedding party typically falls to the groom. As such, the best man can help make that choice in a variety of ways, such as helping to find the right choice of tailored suits, or at least finding options that the groom can then narrow down. From there, the best man can also help herd the rest of the men in the wedding party for the fitting of the suits, finding a day and time where everyone is available to try them on and get measurements at once.
Taking care of the groom during the stag
If you are, indeed, planning for quite a messy stag party, be it a night on the town or a weekend at some sunny beach-side resort, then it should be your priority to make sure that the groom is kept safe and supported during it. There’s a tendency for things to go wild during the stag and, believe it or not, the best man shouldn’t be the one forcing the groom to do this or that, they should be the one looking out for them and knowing when to reel things back in. Most guys have been to a stag where things get awkwardly show-boaty and they’re not pleasant.
Keeping the groom on schedule for the big day
One the big day itself, you’re going to be there, keeping the groom’s nerves steady as always. However, you’re also going to be the one with an eye on the clock, making sure that every groomsman is getting ready in time for whatever transport is taking you to the venue,. You need to make sure that everyone is in the right place, in the right state, and there at the right time. This might also include coordinating with the photographers in the morning if you’re taking some pre-ceremony shots. It’s somewhat acceptable for a bride to be fashionably a couple of minutes late to a wedding, but a groom should never keep a bride waiting, especially if there is a wedding day schedule.
Welcoming the guests
This is a duty that goes forgotten as often as it is fulfilled, but it is the best man’s role (usually) to make sure that all the guests are welcomed as they arrive. Sometimes, the best man isn’t in a position to know everyone attending, so they might not be the right choice, then. However, usually, since the best man is a sibling or best friend, they’re going to be able to remember everyone coming in, to greet them, and to pass them off to the usher who will take them to their seats. It’s a small duty, but it can help set the right tone for the wedding and make sure that guests don’t feel like they’re just wandering into a crowd without any care or attention.
The speech
Let’s not forget the most important, or at least the most nerve-wracking part of all. The best man is traditionally the one who kicks off the toasts. You should take your time ahead of the day to make sure that you have a good speech prepared. Jokes are good, anecdotes are better, but what really matters is that you are able to capture the importance of the groom and his relationship to you, and to wish him a happy life with his new spouse. Following that, the best man is supposed to help carry along the reception, which can include getting out onto the dancefloor with the bride, bride’s mother, maid of honour, and such.
Keeping the groom sane
Wedding nerves can affect just about anyone. Organizing a wedding, even a small and relatively calm one, can be quite a daunting and stressful task. The groom, be he your best friend, sibling, or otherwise, is going to need emotional support even if he doesn’t seem like it. Simply keeping in touch with him, seeing how he’s doing and offering him the opportunity to meet for a pint or a cup of coffee and a chat can help keep an even keel on things. If he is willing to share the stresses and pressures on his mind, you should be there to listen, first and foremost, and to offer any advice only where it’s strictly necessary. You should be a port in a storm, not another voice in his ear, after all.
The best man is there to be the right-hand man of the groom. As such, their duties will largely depend on how much of the prep-work the groom is taking on. As grooms are increasingly sharing the load traditionally thrown at the bride, we can expect to see the best men having to pull more weight, too.